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ControlI was looking at these stormgrey eyes of yours, as we stood there behind the old shop. We were standing close to the walls, so the roof was protecting us from the falling rain.The reason why my knees suddenly seemed so weak, were you -standing just 30 cm away from me. I was holding back my breath and bitting my lip. You looked at me, with a puzzled look in your face. -confused? Not as much as me! Yet there was this strong glow in your eyes."Mel," you asked with soft voice. "I wanted to tell you..."My heart was beating damn fast.-stupid me, I thought to myself. -stupid betraying body. I don't want to feel this. And why are my knees so weak?-Maybe, another voice in my mind said, surely an ally of my weak knees -maybe you're in love with him...You came a little closer to me. "I want to show you..."I leaned towards you and closed my eyes. I could feel you do the same.-stopstopSTOP! I yelled sondlessly at myself, at my traitor of a body -NO, I m
dear momDear momthank you for[always baking fresh breadnever forgetting anythinghugging me, so I feel as good as if i had a purring cat sitting on my laphelping me over and over againscaring away the nightmares and the monster und my bedwiping away my tearsreading my poems]loving me and being my mom
eyes = windows to soul(hands trembling, breath shattered)When it looked out of my eyesAnd it looked in the mirror(frozen tears, insecure heart)When it looked into this same pair of eyesThis teardrinking darkness in my soul(eyes = windows to soul)It saw itself as I saw myselfWas it me or was it It(bleeding hands, melting tears)Who raised my fistsAnd broke the mirror glass?(chrushing sound, powdered ground)
eggshell worldI'm resting in my perfecteggshell worldwith lightblue skiesand summer shining sunmeadows lush and blooming cherry treesI'm dreaming in my perfecteggshell worldwhere chaos is just somethingthat I can hide behindmy closed closet doorsI'm resting in theinside of my mindmy eggshell crackedwith rusty red and brownagainst the holy whiteI'm huddling up herein a nest of broken shardsreality itselflies beyond my feeteven in it's broken state it is really damn sharp
Deserts and gardensAnd I keep writing your nameOver and over againIn the burning sands of this barren desertThat is my soulNow when you are goneAnd the wind keeps wiping your name outAs if it wants me to forgetThis lush gardenThat was my heartWhen you where here
Paper boats (sail my sea)Now I've cried you a seaOf tearsAnd I've wasted so much paperBy writing letters and thenJust folding them toPaper boatsAt least I have a sea to sail inAnd at leastI wont drown in my tears